


Heart of stone

by Nightworldlove



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-15
Updated: 2014-03-15
Packaged: 2018-01-15 21:18:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1319566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightworldlove/pseuds/Nightworldlove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A lot has been going on and things have happened, but not always for the better. Korra has made a decission, even though it's not easy, it's for the better.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heart of stone

**Author's Note:**

> So I felt beyond shit tonight, had an anxiety attack, cried my eyes out and needed to get it off of my chest. And it happened to work best for me by putting it into a writing.

    A decision had been made, Korra sat up in bed and groaned. She stretched herself out and shot a glance next to her, like she expected already the spot was empty. It probably had been already for a while, this was confirmed when Korra reached out with the palm of her hand and felt that the sheets were cold. Asami had left early for work and was now in her office, like every day.

   Korra got out of the bed and yawned, since she had gotten very little sleep again. Thoughts had been keeping sleep away from her again, it was like that for a while already. She knew that if it’d continue like this for much longer, she’d literally break down sooner or later.

   “Time for a shower…” Korra sighed at herself and dragged herself to the luxurious bathroom, avoiding the enormous mirror on purpose. Simply because the Avatar didn’t need confirmation on how terrible she looked, she knew that already without watching her reflection.

   “But it ends here.” Warm water met the mocha colored skin as a welcome blanket of comfort. Korra braced herself for what was about to come, there was no escaping from it; it had to be done.

 

   After a long time of walking back and forth through the hallway, Korra sighed and walked towards the familiar door she’d stood before countless times. She had a hard time to not back out, walk away and just let it go. Deep inside she knew that this was the best, for both of them. The Avatar sucked in a breath, she noticed it was shaky. Ignoring this, she then raised her hand, which was balled into a fist and knocked onto the wooden door in front of her. A few seconds passed before there was an answer.

   “Come in.”

   Korra pushed open the door, stepped inside and closed the door again behind her. “Korra, what are you doing he—?”

   “Can we talk?”

   “Sure, when I’m done with work we can—“ Korra shook her head.

   “No, Asami. We need to talk. _Now_.” She saw Asami’s expression change slowly; first confusion, then there was nervousness.

   “Korra, what’s…?” Asami asked carefully as she stood up and walked towards the Avatar. As she raised her hand to caress Korra’s cheek, her hand was batted away. Korra stepped back and shook her head again.

   “Please, don’t.”

   “Sorry…” Asami looked away, feeling she crossed a line she shouldn’t have.

   “Asami, I just think— It can’t go on like this,” Korra started, reminding herself she just had to do this. “ _I_ can’t go on like this,” she continued.

   “What do you mean, I don’t understand?” Asami’s voice was trembling, which almost made Korra give in.

   “What I mean, Asami, is that I can’t go on with you playing around with my heart as if it’s some kind of a toy.” Asami’s eyes widened at this and Korra swallowed thickly. “I’ve always been here for you, Asami. When everything went downhill with Future Industries, I was there to support you, to soothe you. Then it turned into more, me staying over and comforting you, which was fine. But then you wanted to sleep with me and I thought you loved me, in the beginning. Then it started to look better for the company and you were always busy, whenever _I_ needed you, you weren’t there. Until late at night in bed, you’d make lo— No, you had sex with me. Nothing more. I can’t do that anymore, Asami. I can’t take it anymore, I can’t bring it up any longer. You hurt my feelings over and over and over again and I can’t take it anymore—“

   “But Korra—“

   “No, Asami. Just, just _stop_ ,” Korra interrupted, tears welling up. “I loved you, Asami. I _still_ do. Maybe that’s exactly the problem, I still love you and give it to you, but I get nothing in return.”

   “That’s not true!”

   “Isn’t it? Then tell me, why did you have sex with me? Say it.”

   “Korra, you know that—“

   “Asami, just say it. If it’s not true what I just told, then say it. It’s not that hard, just a few words. That’s all I ask from you,” Korra snapped, tears starting to roll down over her cheeks. Her knuckles had gone white from the tension, the emotions just got the best of the Avatar.

   “I— Korra, I care about you…” Asami stuttered, trying to hold back tears.

   “You know that’s not what I meant,” Korra replied. She wasn’t angry so much, it really was disappointment and hurt she felt right now. “I think it’s better if we just… Stop.” Asami’s head snapped up, mouth hanging open in shock.

   “No! Please, Korra, please don’t...” she pleaded, grabbing Korra’s arm in desperation. Korra looked at the pale and slender fingers wrapped around her upper arm, gulped and shook off Asami’s hand.

   “Too late, Asami. I can’t go on in the hope you’ll love me if I try harder, I’ve tried the hardest I can. And if _that’s_ not good enough, nothing is. Because this is all I have to offer and all I can give.”

   “It’s just, I’ve been through a lot lately and I just—“

   “No, Asami.” Asami looked at the Avatar, confused. Not sure what Korra meant. “You’re right, you _have_ been through a lot lately. I’ve been there, every step of the way, I was there for you. But I’ve been through a damn lot too, because I was trying to comfort you, to make you feel better and pull you out of the misery. Meanwhile I also have my duties as the Avatar, people are counting on me. I’ve done it both at the same time, trying to keep the peace, build Republic City back up, help you to build Future Industries back up, be there for you when you needed a shoulder to cry on, working on my Airbending more with Tenzin…” As Korra stopped talking, she looked at Asami who looked down at the floor.

    “I wish I could lo— I really do, Korra. But, it just… It just isn’t there,” Asami stuttered, wishing she could love the Avatar the way Korra loved her.

   “I know that. That’s why I think we need to take a break, ‘Sami. Just not see each other for a while—“

   “But Korra, can’t we be friends—?” Again, Korra shook her head.

   “Not right now, I’m not sure when, but right now we certainly can’t. _I_ can’t, Asami. Right now, I need some space. Please give me that, it’s all I’m asking for. I think you owe me something in return and what I ask from you in return isn’t much, especially not in comparison, I think,” she explained and Asami weakly nodded.

 

   It wasn’t so much that she agreed, but admitted that the Avatar was right. It felt horrible, she felt horrible and it was all her own fault. Asami had taken advantage of her friend, without even really realizing how much damage it caused. Until now, now it was too late and the damage had already been done. She lost Korra, she lost her friend. Their friendship, she damaged it and wasn’t sure if the damage could be undone, ever.

   “I…” Asami tried, choking up in her tears which made her throat thick. “I’m so sorry, Korra! I really am! I don’t want to lose you, I’ve been so stupid and I hurt you. I hurt my _friend_ and I screwed up…” Asami’s knees gave out and she felt herself fall, this time Korra wasn’t there to save her and Asami couldn’t blame her.

   “I’m sorry too, Asami. I am, too.” It wasn’t much more than a soft whisper; hurt clearly audible in it. “Maybe time can heal the wounds…” Asami looked up at the Avatar, wiping away tears while doing so. “But scars never go away completely,” Korra continued and looked at Asami. A stab of pain in her heart, as she saw the regret in Asami’s eyes. But she wasn’t ready to forgive, there was a long way to go before Korra would be able to forgive.

   “I know…” Asami muttered soundlessly.

   “Goodbye Asami,” Korra whispered, swallowing in order to try and hold back more tears. She turned around and walked out of the room, leaving Asami behind in the office.

   “I’m sorry, Korra…” Asami cried softly after she watched her former friend walk away for probably the last time. “I _do_ love you…”


End file.
